Thursday, February 24, 2011

What is true beauty?

I had an interesting conversation with a wonderful friend. She is one of my bestest friends, and I think she is beautiful. The more I know about her, and how she handles the tough stuff in her life, the more beauty I see. This friend has two daughters whom I adore. Remember that I only have one daughter? This daughter of mine is so much different to raise than all.our.boys! Our conversation led us to a "tween" topic. A parenting book on tween girls recommended (advised?) that tween girls need to go shopping. Mom's like me, whom don't care for shopping, should learn to like it. Shopping makes tween girls feel pretty.

Now this is where it gets touchy.

If you like to shop, so be it. If you like to shop... a lot... that is your business, your thing, your money. If you like the hip cool newest fads, for yourself, or your daughters... there is nothing wrong with that. My friend is very wise and clever with her money, and they dress very stylish, and carry it with class.

It just isn't MY thing.

I like nice. I like practical. I really enjoy an outfit w/ fun accessories that match. I even think dresses would be fun if I wasn't so round. =)

My hard question is...
Does our apparel make our beauty?
Does our size define our beauty?
Does our hairstyle/make-up/nails create our beauty?

What makes you feel beautiful?

I spent many years with an eating disorder. The more perfect I strived to be, the uglier I felt. My younger years were full of fun hip clothes, fabulous hair, a small size, and a big flirty smile... yep, them were the days...
The days of shallowness, emptiness, being at a loss.

The more I played around with my image, the less I knew who I really was. I was searching for an outer validation to an inner void.

I still don't feel pretty, but a few things (despite my appearances) makes me feel beautiful...

*when my littles love snuggling up to me & find comfort in my extra padding.
*prayer walking~ a good brisk walk while praying, ahhh, fresh air & mental clarity.
*when I am just being me on an average day and dh stops abruptly to glance at me and says "do you know how beautiful you are?"
*reaching out & listening~ when the Holy Spirit leads you to talk to someone, and you do, and you find out they really needed someone to know they mattered.

So I tell my 9 yr old dear daughter that regardless of the clothes she wears, and the fashion she likes, and the girly things we will do together... she is and always will be beautiful. There are always things about us that are not good enough in the world's opinion, and I share the importance of letting God's love define who we are...



inner beauty reflects
what we do
and who we are,
right where we are!

Friends, you are beautiful!


Mama D.'s Dozen said...

Great thoughts!

Just yesterday, my 9 year old son came up to me TWICE and whispered in my ear, "You're beautiful!"

I definitely felt much more beautiful than when I look in the mirror ... or buy new clothes ... or get a new haircut.

I wasn't dressed up. There was nothing "fancy" about me yesterday. But, for some unexplained reason, my little guy just had to tell his Mama that he thought I was beautiful.

Music to my ears!

:) :) :)

Cassandra, James and Madison said...

As I tell Madison, no matter what anyone says or how you feel, always know that you are beautiful and special.
We shop for necessities. Madison loves to shop. I do not. We do once a month to two go, window shopping for clothes. She loves to. We never come home with anything though. But she loves the thrill of it I guess. Uh, not looking for the teen years when everyone else has it Mom. But she knows just because everyone else has it, doesn't mean Madison has it. You got to be unique, right ? :)

*~ Tina ~* said...

Sheri, I was just looking at your picture. . .you are beautiful! Love the red hair :) People pay good money for that color!

Hollinger Family said...

Thanks Tina, you're such a sweetie!
... good money does buy this color *grin*, I "use" to be a darker auburn, but the grey was taking over ;^) keeping it real, as always...
and my self esteem is still recovering from cutting all my hair off for locks of love. Glad I did it for the girl we gave to, but I never realized how comfortable I was in my hair. ??